Are You Sabotaging Your Writing Goals?
When *Maria and I first talked, I noticed something immediately. I see this over and over again in many of the writers I talk to.
“I want to finish this novel but can’t seem to get past chapter twenty,” Maria said. “I know this book will resonate with a lot of people. I know that it’s a good story. So why am I dragging my feet?”
Maria was dealing with a three-fold problem.
Many of us writers have these same issues. The root cause though, is nearly always self-sabotage.
Reason #1: Fear of Rejection
Writers are by nature, sensitive people. This is actually a good thing. It’s what helps you to imagine what it must be like to be in specific situations or to deal with certain problems. Your writer’s sensitivity also allows you to notice things that others don’t.
In social situations as a writer, you may frequently hang back, observing, noticing, and mentally recording little bits of information for future use. Most of the time you’re probably not even aware you’re doing this.
While writing is an excellent form of self-expression it’s not usually the final stage of the process. Unless you are journaling, chances are good that you want to complete the loop and share your work with others.
That’s where the fear of rejection comes in.
Writing for yourself is one thing. Sharing something you’ve written with one other trusted friend or mentor is another. And putting it out into the world at large? That’s something else entirely.
Many a writer has finished a book — or several of them — and never done anything with the final manuscript.
Instead, they sit on the sidelines of publishing, watching others show off their freshly printed novels or nonfiction books and wondering, “What is wrong with me? Why can’t I do that?”
Fear of rejection often comes from perfectionism. Writers drag their feet because deep down they recognize that if they write something, they’ll have to let others read it. And that means you’ll be setting yourself up for criticism or maybe even ridicule. Sometimes this shows up as writer’s block.
Frequently, it feels like whatever you write is awful.
To protect against this yucky feeling, the perfectionist takes over. It finds oodles of problems wrong with your manuscript. It pokes at your sensitive conscience, telling you you’re not ready, the writing isn’t ready, and it’s better to keep it hidden for now. “Later,” “Tomorrow” and “Next year” become your mantras.
Reason #2: Not Unique
One of the greatest things about the internet is the way it connects us. You have more information, inspiration, and connectivity available at your fingertips than your great-great-great grandmother likely had in her entire life.
The downside? All of this connection makes it easy to see what others are doing. And feel like big, fat writing failures.
Everywhere you look online you see other people writing stellar blog posts, penning best-selling books, or sharing their thought-provoking articles.
Meanwhile, you’re staring at your computer screen with a look of hate, wondering what the heck is wrong with you because you can’t finish this stupid chapter and why are you even writing this dumb book anyway when no one will ever read it?
Being yourself means being free. Uniqueness is a hard thing to come by. The best first step to finding your own writing voice is to just keep writing. Continuing to put yourself out there can be scary. But it’s also freeing.
Reason #3: No System
Having a system in writing is very unglamorous. It’s much more interesting to sign up for (another) course that promises us overnight best-seller status or troll social media sites and try to figure out how to plan your future book marketing campaign.
Creating a simple system that you can stick to though is incredibly valuable.
It helps you capture and organize your ideas, commit to a plan of small writing habits, and finally see progress on your writing goal.
When you build accountability into the system, you’ll see the progress you’re making and enjoy celebrating successes big and small with someone else.
Potential pitfall: Systems must be SIMPLE in order for you to stick with them long-term. Any system with too many moving parts or making too many demands of you on a regular basis will likely end up by the side of the road on your writer’s journey.
Choosing small, doable goals is important. Accomplishing these will help you keep momentum and excitement on the writing journey.
You Can Change This Mindset
Sabotaging yourself as a writer isn’t an intentional thing. You don’t wake up one morning wondering how to tear down all the progress you’ve made or make your life harder.
Recognizing these three tricky areas can help you be proactive and set yourself up for writing success.
Q: Which of these three reasons resonated with you?
*Name changed to protect client identity.
Joy Choquette loves being outside, sipping hot beverages, and reading great books. . . sometimes all at the same time. She’s been writing professionally for the past 15 years and is the author of 10 atmospheric suspense novels.
She helps frustrated, overwhelmed, time-starved writers to find simple, easy-to-manage systems that support their writing practices. Learn more on her website for writers.
